Fallacy of LOVE

(just finished smoking a half pack of Marlboro Menthol... can't sleep even though the sun is already on its way up... drinking a hot choco because the weather is too damn cold... just finished reading the book "Rich Dad Poor Dad"... and a black cat is sleeping on my lap... these are my inspirations for this blog...)

Let me start by asking... what is LOVE?

Some say it's a give and take relationship...

Some say it's the basis of marriage...

Hmm...

To me.. it's this...

And I'm gonna START being IDEALISTIC on this one.

Love is a ONE WAY STREET...

Huh? One way??

Yes, ONE WAY.

A Half-Duplex in networking communication terms.

When you LOVE someone, it's the welfare of that person that YOU should keep in mind.

Especially that person's HAPPINESS.

Why is that?

Well... PURE (and UNCONDITIONAL) LOVE means that you SHOULD care for that person, give WILLINGLY to that person's desires, let that person have FREEDOM to reach his/her DREAMS and AMBITIONS.

When that person has those things, that person would have his/her HAPPINESS.

Is this martyrdom?

Actually, YES.

But what about YOURSELF?

Now this is where TRUST and FAITH comes in.

You must TRUST that person to LOVE you back.

You must HAVE FAITH in that person to LOVE you back.

And believe me, you can't CONTROL a person, for that person has his/her own characteristics and beliefs that made him/her an INDIVIDUAL.

It's like the FUTURE... you CAN'T control it... the only thing you can control is your REACTION to it.

Is LOVE a give and take relationship?

Nope.

You call that a ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIP.

Or in other words, "They LOVE one another".

Love is in a FIRST PERSON point of view. It's SUBJECTIVE. You know you're in LOVE, but you just don't REALLY know if your partner is REALLY in LOVE with you.

That's why SOME relationships don't work. Because they REALLY are NOT in LOVE with each other.

When you go into a relationship, think of these:

1. Could you REALLY make that person HAPPY?
2. Could that person REALLY accept YOU for what you really are (vice versa)?
3. Could that person be a part of your AMBITIONS/DREAMS?

The last one is a selfish question. Because you REALLY can't hold on to a relationship when YOU are NOT really HAPPY. You could get easily tempted by things that could break the relationship. Because contentment can't REALLY happen when you can't even reach HAPPINESS.

And CONTENTMENT is the final goal in a relationship.

"I'm HAPPY when he/she is HAPPY"

Bummer.

Humans are naturally selfish.

It's HOW you control that selfishness is what really matters.

Too much selfishness breaks up the relationship.

Understanding one another is the KEY.

Have an open line of communication. Know your partner's WANTS. Let it GUIDE you to yours. MEET HALFWAY.

And ALWAYS, have an OPEN MIND.

Have FAITH in yourself to REALLY love that person. Have FAITH in your LOVE to that person. Have FAITH in GOD and HOPE that the person you LOVE gives the same LOVE back.

You should ALWAYS think that the relationship is IMPORTANT.

If you don't, LOVE would wane.

But IF a relationship fails, don't despair.

It's EITHER you made it fail, or that person made it fail, or both. (and DON'T let it be YOU)

It fails, because there was a FLAW in your LOVE for each other.

And when it does, the relationship wasn't MEANT to be.

And lastly, LEARN from IT. (Winners are NOT afraid to LOSE. Because LOSING makes them much SMARTER.)